Tag Archives: new beginnings

After the Dust Settles

We thank our newest blogger, who wants to remain anonymous at this time, for sharing this beautiful blog post with our readers! Your strength and courage is an inspiration to all of us.

It’s January 2019. Two years ago, January 2017, I was pregnant with my daughter, awaiting her arrival with my then partner. Within these 2 years I have gone through some very rapid transformations. From woman to mother to single mother. From postpartum depression to domestic violence to “just enjoying life” so to speak. My daughter has undergone many transformations too. From babyhood to toddlerhood. Every day I watch her and it gives me new joy and hope.


I feel strange that I now stand here with a new paint brush and a blank canvas.

It dawned on me the other day that now I am in my own territory. Completely on my own. Through the violence from her father, police interruptions and a family court case… my daughter and I made it out! And it made me a better person in the end. I write this now, as a reflection. Sitting with the unknown future. Sitting with past attitudes and outlooks. I feel strange that I now stand here with a new paint brush and a blank canvas. It’s foreign to not have specific stress which looms in the background. I am more than pleased to have this peaceful beginning.


There is light at the end of that dark and scary tunnel.

After much therapy and self love, I was able to heal. Connecting with my community, friends and family. It’s really important to reconnect with oneself after ending an abusive relationship. Making my art, having art shows, jogging, meditation and yoga helped me ground myself through all the stressy mess.

For anyone going through a tough time, I get it. There is light at the end of that dark and scary tunnel. Believe in your strength.

To anyone who has been abused, in any way, always remember that it’s not you. It’s a reflection of how low this person feels to make sure they put you down.¬†It’s a reflection of their own hurt. Hurt people, hurt people. Don’t let them dim your lightūüĆü

Macie – Part I

When Macie refused to enter into an arranged marriage, her family cut her off.

Macie first came to Canada as an international student. She was fortunate to have a family back home in Africa that was able to provide her with the means needed to study towards her degree in Hospitality and Tourism at Niagara College. Macie enjoyed her course and getting to know Canadians and their culture. About six months into her studies, however, she got the call from her family that changed her life. They expected Macie to return home to enter a marriage that had been arranged for her. A marriage to a stranger who is in his 50s. Macie is 20 years old.

“I have never felt this scared in my life,” said Macie when she came to the YW on a cool morning in April. She had begged and pleaded with her family, trying to make them understand that she wanted more of life than to be a wife to a stranger and to bear his children. Her family was shocked and felt ashamed by their daughter’s refusal. They cut off all of Macie’s support, their way of trying to force her to come back to Africa. Over night, life became a battle of survival.


Macie felt alone and scared and lost. She began to slip into depression.

Macie applied for refugee status which, thankfully, she was granted. While that took one worry away, it still left her forced to drop out of school. Macie started to work a minimum wage job that turned into a part-time job in the colder winter months. It was not enough to make ends meet. She was no longer able to afford her accommodation. Forced to move, she rented a room she found online. Macie felt alone and scared and lost. She began to slip into depression.

Finally, thanks to a friend at work, Macie learned about the YW and the many programs we offer and she decided to apply. She entered the Off-Site Transitional Housing program in June of 2018. During her time in the program Macie has continued to work and support herself by taking as many hours as possible at work. Macie signed up as a volunteer for as many organizations as she was able to fit into her schedule. She has applied and been granted permanent residence in Canada. And her biggest joy of all, thanks to all of her hard work and drive, she will be starting back to her post-secondary education in September 2019. The strides she has made within only a few months of being in the program are nothing short of amazing. “I am so grateful for the support of the YW and my incredible worker. With the YW in my corner, I can overcome anything. I can’t wait to see what my next six months in the program will bring.”

Macie shared her journey with us earlier in 2019. Only a few months later, she had even more amazing accomplishments to share with us… read Part II of Macie’s story >>>

New BEE-ginnings

This past Spring I had the pleasure of witnessing, in action my daughter Emilee’s leap of faith into a new “out of the box” career in of all things BEEKEEPING. A far-cry from her post-secondary schooling in graphic design. Her new bee-ginning, like Emilee herself, happened in unique layers…… of research, coincidence, serendipity, a chance meeting and an interview that sealed the deal….her indomitable spirit and all those moments added up to her now working for the largest apiary in Niagara.

Beekeeping on such a large scale, is not easy to say the least, holding her own in a male dominated field, she comes home physically exhausted as beekeeping involves a lot of heavy lifting, sweaty as the suit covers you from head to toe, smelling of smoke which is used when opening up the hives, on rare occasions with a bee sting and …………. the happiest I have ever seen her!

As Spring brings graduations and the promise of new beginnings for graduates, let Emilee’s story demonstrate that your dream career and future take time to materialize, just be patient. Sometimes, it turns out that what you have gone to school for you don’t see yourself doing for the rest of your life, and that is okay. Emilee had to find the strength within herself to find her passion, redefine herself and have the confidence to pursue the career she wanted. She had to face set backs, and trust me there were a few, and continue to pursue her dream of working with bees and making an impact on the future of our environment.

My hope was to raise a socially conscience, independent young woman, and watching her through this process, I realized I had. A part of that for me was letting go, knowing she would be okay.
As a parent, it was sometimes difficult to watch her experience this process, and not try to make it “all right”. I was her sounding board, cheerleader and realized the best support I could give her through it all, was to let her figure it out on her own. She did.

Through her process, I have come to not only truly appreciate the Honeybee, but I am now a wealth of random facts about them. Honeybees are important pollinators for flowers, fruits, and vegetables, and unfortunately they are disappearing from hives due to colony collapse disorder, Which is why it is so important to build up the Honeybee population. My personal favourite: They do a little bee dance, which is their way of communicating to the other bees where the food source is – the dance is a map on how to get there!

This past spring I had the pleasure of witnessing an incredible leap of faith, and our bee population is better for it.

Blogger Talk

Donna

As students prepare for graduation, growing to a new phase in their lives, what advice would you give them that may help with this process?

Be fearless, keep your options open, and always choose in favour of your passions.  I believe you can do anything.

June has us celebrating Fathers, what sage advice or words of wisdom, has your Dad given you, that you want to share?

A man of few words, my Dad taught me that you never have to raise your voice to be heard.  Always be humble and kind.

What is/was your relationship with your Father like?  If you could change one thing, what would it be? 

My¬†relationship with my Dad was one of ease, love and humour.¬† The only thing I would change is, he’d still be¬†with us.

The month of June always brings such promise of renewal, what is your spring/summer renewal ritual?  Do you have one?

As soon as the sun warm the earth, you will find me wandering the Garden Centres.  Inhaling deeply to fill my soul, and buying way too many plants for the small gardening space I have.

Share with us something new that you have tried, are doing or embarking on this spring/summer.

Tried Edamame, and now I am hooked!  So delicious.

Valerie

As students prepare for graduation, growing to a new phase in their lives, what advice would you give them that may help with this process?

The best advice I can give to students getting ready to graduate is, explore. Explore your community, country, yourself or the world. Know that this is your life and you do not have to conform to societal expectations. One of the best parts of graduating is knowing you can take some time to discover yourself. Set goals, make a plan and do things for you. It is through self care and exploration that you will discover your place in the world. Never underestimate the value of exploring your own community, understanding where you are can help lead you to where you want to go.

Do you believe students graduating today in any field of study have been prepared for the future, for a career in their field?

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