We’re already one month into 2020 and a lot of people have been working hard on their New Year’s resolutions. Some people are looking for eat healthier this year, or hit the gym at least three times a week. Here at the YW, New Year’s resolutions look a little different as our clients work to make 2020 a year of stability and growth. This may be the year they find affordable housing for themselves and their families, or it could be a year of empowerment as they build the courage to leave difficult environment and come to the YW for help. Everyone’s resolutions look different and this year, so do mine.
This year, I am dedicating to my feminist self in hopes that creating these healthy, self-positive habits now will continue on for me for years to come and maybe even help some people along the way too.
Be proud of who you are
Every person is a unique complex being with an identity comprised so many different layers. This year, I want to be proud of every one of those layers that makes me unique – that makes me, well, me. An important layer of my identity is being a woman and being a feminist woman. I no longer want to be shy about talking about the female experience. This year, I will be loudly proud of my identity, speak openly to my male peers about my unique experiences and refuse to let my female identity to be quieted.
Don’t quietly accept sexist treatment
I can’t think of a situation that makes me more uncomfortable than unprompted street harassment. It happened to me recently and I am sure it will happen again. Except next time, I won’t let a stranger makes me feel uncomfortable or ashamed for walking down the sidewalk alone. I recently learned that if someone makes you uncomfortable in public, you can tell them. You can make a scene and draw attention to the situation. You can yell, “Don’t you see you’re making me feel uncomfortable?!” and “I don’t like the way you’re talking to me?!” If you’re tired of keeping your gaze low, staring at the sidewalk and praying a catcallers doesn’t decide to follow you down the street, you have options.
Talk about the taboo because being “ladylike” is overrated
It’s 2020 and, while it is hard to believe, there are still women’s issues that are taboo to talk about. Important, meaningful topics that are “unladylike” to talk about. Birth control, sexual health, mensuration, post-partum depression, sex work, the list goes on… when we never talk about these topics, they become a seed for shame in our lives. If we don’t talk about these things, there will be no one to advocate for the person too embarrassed to go to the doctor with women’s health concerns, or the struggling new mom who doesn’t understand why she is so sad during what she expected to be the happiest days of her life. Whether I am telling a personal story or supporting a friend or family member talking about her female experience, this year will be a year of making the taboo not taboo anymore.
Don’t be embarrassed to exercise your basic human rights
It is my basic human right to walk down a public sidewalk at any time of the day. It is my basic human right to go to express my opinion on topics that are important to me. It my basic human right to skip my makeup routine if I want to. Yet, when I do these things, I feel embarrassed and judged and sometimes even unsafe. Entering this new age of Feminist Me, I am going to work harder to understand why I feel this way when I go against the grain and take steps to empower myself when I exercise my basic human right. I know I am in a fortunate position to be able to be in public alone, speak up when I want and express myself however I feel – it is time to be proud about it.
My resolutions for the start of a new decade look different than they ever have before. And I know this is the first step of many to seeing and moving through the world with a feminist lens. I am excited to take charge of empowering me this year and I hope I am able to empower other women who feel embarrassed, isolated, judged and afraid to talk about their unique female experience. So cheers to a new year and a new decade of female-forward action.